Cozie Blog

Life is nice when you're Cozie


by coie - December 29th, 2005.
Filed under: Uncategorized.

What’s this?  46
visits from someone in one day?  Wow!
They spent over 12 hours on my blog during those visits? 


I was getting freaked out. 
I mean, why was this person stalking me? 
They never left comments.  Just
lurked…and lurked and lurked.  While they
kept an eye on my blog, I was tracking them and investigating.


This stalker was from Germantown,
.  I only knew of one blogger from MD. And I knew it
wasn’t him because he’s too serious
to read a blog like mine; and I think I did a Mapquest and he was too far
away.  Can’t remember.  No, Agent Tim was not the suspect.


I almost did a fake poll on my blog to figure out who it
was.  I can take readers from Belgium, Canada,
Iran, Panama, and Scotland, but Maryland– No way.  I’ve been
there and it ain’t pretty.


I started being more careful about what I blogged.  Maybe if I just talked about what I did
everyday and put “lol”
at the end of every sentence
, they would be too bored to read my blog


Just when I was reaching the climax of my fear mountain, I
found the culprit.  And I think I should
end this here.


You don’t really want to know right?  Grrr..fine fine.


So, we use Direcway satellite internet and we get our
e-mails through it.  We went up to Michigan for a week or
so and I got online to check my e-mail since I hadn’t set it up Outlook
yet.  So I got to the site and just
happened to see the address for Direcway. 
Germantown, Maryland. 
What what?  I told dad my thoughts
and he told me it made sense.  It wouldn’t
show up as Knoxville
for me because we use satellite.


So yeah, I was stalking myself.  I’m so vain and conceited…which I think is
actually a redundant phrase.  And
according to my statcounter, I continue to stalk myself.  I wonder if I am unintentionally stalking
anyone else.  If you guys get any
continuous visits from Germantown,
using Firefox, I guess that’s me.  I’m
still in shock that I could do such a thing to myself.  I’m just happy I didn’t pull out the
blackmail ammo.  Whew.


Anyways, I’ve set up the pronunciation guide/ dictionary
that I promised.  It’s there in my
sidebar- yeah that thing on the right that keeps getting longer- that’s
it.  Also, buy that e-book I link to
under “Where I’ve been published”….But don’t buy it unless you’ve clicked on that
link to buy it, ok?  Why?  Because I’m a part of the affiliate program
and I make money off that little button. 
I’ve considered clicking it and buying it, because I would get like 66% mailed
back to me, but then I remembered that I wrote a chapter and my aunt published
it, so I could probably get it for free. 
I’ll have to look into that.  This
post is officially one Microsoft Word Document page long, so I’m signing
off.  Paste it into a .doc if you don’t
believe me.  😛


  1. hahahaha

    Since I’m still using Tracy’s computer… I ready your blog outloud here in her room and we are both laughing. First I was like “see Tracy I want your face off any blogs..that’s why people stalk see I’m not crazy this stuff happens….. listen to what Coie is saying….

    and than I read on and we laughed. Your funny. Your momsie is funny too. I like you both.

    Auntie Maria

    who can’t wait to feed you tomorrow night!

  2. Untitled Comment

    Too funny. You know you can block your counter from counting your visits don’t you? Better a stalker be you than an unknown. Trust me on that.

  3. Untitled Comment

    you’re very weird. at this rate i’ll never get you married off. which actually is a good thing. so keep it up, LoopyLooLoo.

  4. Untitled Comment

    Auntie Maria- I’m sorry for dashing your concerns about pictures on the internet.

    Mrs. Spunky- With satellite, you don’t actually have a set IP address, so I can’t block me from my stats.

    Mrs. Momsie- Yes, with my loopiness and your requirements (aussie or jamaican accent, lives in a 5 mile radius, and loopy like the rest of our family) I think I will forever be in the room next door to you…In the asylum.

  5. Untitled Comment

    THAT’S where those Germantown hits were from. Gee…I was wondering who was stalking MY site. Good grief. Glad to have found the culprit.

  6. Have you lost your mind?

    Posting text into a raw DOC file is a recipe for… uh… bad scripts! Those are NOT fun!

    Happy New Year

  7. The Insane Asylum?

    Hey, that’s where I am, too! They said something about rounding up ‘those Pesky, Meglomaniacal, Radical, Far-Right, Evangelical Christian Homeschool Bigot Hate-Mongers!’.

    -Darth Vader, an extra-terrestrial from the planet Vulcan.

  8. Princesslovestolaugh

    Ha ha!!!!!!!

    That was pretty hillarious! Your mom’s requirements for eligable gents were pretty funny too 😀

    What’s really funny though is, the whole time my mom was reading that and freaking out and being overprotective and generally getting ready to have a breakdown over this “real life example” I was saying “mom, there is no way Coie would post something like that without it being funny, it’s a hoax or something” and then I got halfway through and figured out that “you” were probably stalking yourself. LOL And the whole time she was completly convinced and yeah…. I’ll probably hear it for this one but, oh well.

    Can’t wait to have you over tommorow and get to hang out with you for the first time! Yaynesses!

    See ya then!


  9. Untitled Comment

    In my nervousness of noticing someone from Germantown on my blog again, I forgot to mention one other thing besides the pronunciation guide/dictionary on my sidebar. It’s the “What others have said about me” section. Be sure to click on those people’s names and read their blogs– it gives me higher stats…er, it’s some arrangement we’ve worked out. Thanks, you guys are great!

  10. You scared me…..

    but it’s nice to know your safe……in an asylum! LOL! LOL! LOL! LOL! I should stop now.

    0:) Amber

    PS~ Thanks alot for picking ME to be a winner, I’ll be sure to return the favor.

  11. Untitled Comment

    This is my first visit to your blog and I lol’d. You have your mom’s wonderful sense of humor and perspective. I’ll enjoy visiting often…although it won’t be 47 times in one hour..ok, maybe in 4 hours..that would be 11 visits an hour…one visit every 6 minutes or so…that’s not too psychotic, is it? The city that will show on the stats HoeNRake, I mean Hoenwald, TN.


  12. Untitled Comment

    you are too funny! (i think that’s why mt stat counter is high too…i check it too often!)

    thanks for picking me on your Mom’s contest! it’s so apropo that something “space oriented” happened on my birthday!


  13. Ohhh

    Coie, you’re just plain wacko. What’s wrong with a South African accent??? You could marry Calvin!! But that didn’t come from me

  14. Oh my gosh!

    I am laughing out loud on the inside! On the inside, I am totally cracking up! You have listed yet one more reason statcounter should be banned. The other reason is b/c it makes you aware of how many people just LURK on your site and don’t leave comments. Well, it doesn’t look like people lurk on YOUR site. But I KNOW they lurk on MY site. I suppose that is the up-side of statcounter–the knowledge that someone is actually reading my blog. Even if it’s only me. Thankfully, I’m not narcissistic enough to stalk myself. LOL at me. Aren’t I funny? Ok, maybe I could be narcissistic enough to stalk myself. I just haven’t done it yet. Watch out, MelismaTo4–4oTamsileM’s a stalker waiting to happen!

  15. pronunciation guide

    So… what if we all just start calling you Snowy Potato… it rhymes anyway! LOL

    My maiden name was Zuckschwerdt… In German it is pronounced Zook-SCHVAIRT…. but no one could ever say that… so we reverted to a decidedly American pronunciation that rymes with Duck-Shirt!

    Oh well! That is why I married a man with the last name of BROWN!


  16. Untitled Comment

    Oh my gosh, that’s amazing Coie! That’s why you should use a service that lets you block your own visits…

    Oh wait… you already do! Haha! Make use of that blocking cookie!

  17. Potato?

    How does Igarashi rhyme with potato?

    Jake (who is wondering about three things: your dad, your garage and paint)

  18. Untitled Comment

    Ok, so Igarashi does not rhyme with potato; I wanted to see how many people would try to put that together. Stop ruining my evil plans.

    And yes, since we cannot play paintball yet (don’t want to hit the neighbors!) my dad and brother volunteered to be moving targets. 😀 Dad also set up a tarp in the garage since it was raining two nights ago, and we got to shoot at a stool, a ladder, and two jugs of water. I think I’m getting better. We still haven’t cleaned up the paint so maybe I will capture a pic and share. 🙂

  19. Ohhhhh….

    So that’s why you have paint all over your garage!!! It was so random when you told me that you had paint all over your garage but then you didn’t even tell me why!! That was strange.

  20. Untitled Comment

    heehee, that is hilarious!!!!!!

  21. Oh, Coie, you brightened my day!

    At least I don’t stalk myself! aldkfjalsdfkjsldfjlsdakfjlsdkfjlskdfj

  22. COIE??????????


    are you going to make my template or not??? I’m sorry but i’m loosing my patients. I can’t wait till tonight!!!! my grandma is coming today!!

    are you still working on felicity’s template??!!!?!?!????????


  23. Untitled Comment

    Blessings to you and yours in the coming year!

    In Him,

    “Ant” Amy

  24. from a old Marylander

    Hi there. Just found your blog through your moms. Pretty cool. Will have to pass this onto my 2 DD’s.

    But, i do take issue.. haha.. with your Maryland statement. I was born and raised there. Also not to far from Germantown. MD is not all that bad.. Yes, I couldn’t wait to leave.. I mean come on.. 3 winters in a row of having to dig my way to the barn.. Not my picture of paradise. But, all in all MD is a beautiful state when it’s not covered with snow ( though it’s pretty there too – just in pictures). The Fall and Spring were the prettiest. Beautiful fall leaves, rolling hills and amazing flowers and smells. Just thought I’d give MD a litlle boost here.

    I did find if funny (ROFL) that it did end up being yourself stalking.. didn’t even know someone could do that.

    Have a great one! Keep up the great blogging.

Leave a Reply